How You Listen Changes Everything

How you listen changes everything. It’s who you are to someone. It creates who they are for you and who you are for them. Feeling gotten, known, seen for who we are and then feeling welcome, wanted, and valued. This feels AMAZING. It’s better than any drug, any food, or any vibrator-induced orgasm. It’s why we are here.

Humans are wired for connection. Our brains are literally built for relationships and connection. Without connection, we feel lonely. It doesn’t matter how many people we are around or how much entertainment we are having, without connection we feel lonely. Loneliness is a signal – like hunger signals a need for food – that we are low on connection and that we need it soon.

Without adequate connection, our brains, bodies, and emotions don’t function all that well. We get depressed, sick, anxious, don’t sleep well, eat too much, and wonder what’s the meaning of life and why does it feel so empty.

The two best ways to create connection are with listening and touch. Physical touch that is kind, clear, and consensual is healing and connecting. More about that later. For now, let’s focus on listening.

Listening is the act of tuning in to another to hear what they are saying. We can listen to words, to tone, to body language, to facial expressions, and to the feelings that arise in us in response to anothers speaking. In Deep Listening, you learn how to do all of these with the focus on listening to words, tone, and your own experiences – feelings and thoughts – that arise while you are listening.

It will change your life.

Even if you think you are already a good listener (and you probably are) this class will give you what you need to take it to the next level. I’ve had Nonviolent Communication practitioners, Cocounseling veterans, 12-step participants, teachers, workshop leaders, and relationship junkies all take Deep Listening and each of them got something valuable out of it. Each of them found it worth more than the money and time they invested. Many people form lasting friendships out of their participation. Work gets easier and more fulfilling. Raises happen. Coparenting smooths out. More clients come. Relationships are changed forever.

Sound good? It is!

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