Yesterday I hosted our monthly Community Cuddles event. 15 people gathered in a living room. Soft lighting. Curious conversation. Nervousness that palpably fell away as I facilitated the group through connection, consent, and listening exercises.
Soft blankets. Soft lighting. Soft surfaces to sit and recline on.
Clear boundaries. Practicing yes and no. Practicing making requests. Practicing asking for what you want to receive rather than giving to someone else because you are afraid they won’t want to give to you. Learning that is soft yet strong.
For some, it’s life-changing.
The woman who has a lifetime distrust of touching men, leaning into the shoulder of a man she’s learned to trust because they do this event together. The military guy who has to find the right answers and show no emotion, saying “I don’t know what I want and it’s not usually safe to ask,” then using this event as a safe place to be vulnerable, notice what he wants, ask for it, and get it. The self-proclaimed introvert who hates parties because the conversations are always so empty stating in our closing circle, “I’m so grateful to myself for coming. Otherwise, I would have just hibernated at home.”
The conversations we had were anything but empty. Laughter and tears were both welcomed and seen. We risked taking off our social masks and showing up as ourselves. One client recently said to me “I don’t know who I am because I don’t practice.” Come join us on January 19th 2020 while we practice taking off our masks, being ourselves, asking for what we want, and daring to notice who we are when we get it.